WS Chronicle

By Busta Brown

The lyrics to Rev. Paul Jones’ gospel classic “I Won’t Complain” remind us that power lies in prayer and faith, not in complaining. As Jones sings, “I’ve had some hills to climb/I’ve had some weary days, and some sleepless nights/ but when I look around and I think things over/all of my good days outweigh my bad days/I won’t complain.” 

This reflects the life of my dear friend of 30 years, retired Greensboro Lieutenant Alexander Ricketts. His journey has not been easy, but he has never complained. He reiterates the song lyrics, “Whatever challenges I’ve faced in life/and no matter what I’m facing now/I know things are going to get better/And even if they don’t, and things get worse/I know I’ve tried to live a good life and do my best/So, I won’t complain.”

Ricketts’ story mirrors the message in the song. Despite life’s hardships, the choice to focus on gratitude and maintain faith can help us persevere. Even when circumstances are difficult, his refusal to complain and his confidence that things will improve, he has lived honorably. This serves as powerful reminders of the strength found in faith, perspective, and resilience. This story encourages us to look at our own lives, choose hope, and recognize that even in the face of adversity, there is always a reason to be thankful. 

In 2018, Alexander Ricketts was diagnosed with prostate cancer, but he remained hopeful and positive, trusting that the results would unfold as God planned. “I went to my doctor for a physical, and they noticed that my PSA numbers were high and couldn’t get them to go down. I had to go to a urologist, who did a biopsy. That’s when I found out I had cancer,” Ricketts shared. 

Like anyone who receives such news, he was upset but kept his composure. “I was like, ‘Wow, I can’t believe I have cancer.’ But I wasn’t thinking, ‘Oh, I’m going to die!’” he said. “I immediately thanked God that I got my physical, because I probably wouldn’t be sitting here talking to you right now. 

“The cancer could have spread if I hadn’t caught it earlier. It’s genetic. My dad, whom I never knew, had prostate cancer too and died from it at only 54 years old, because he didn’t get his prostate removed. I didn’t get to meet him. I look a lot like my father,” Alexander shared, with a slight trembling in his voice. 

Ricketts didn’t want to risk facing the same fate as his father, so he made the decision to have his prostate removed. He has some important advice for other men: “A lot of guys are scared to do it because of concerns about sexual function and other issues,” he said. But he chose to move forward with the surgery. “I had it done robotically, which helped preserve a lot of my nerves, so I’m able to maintain all the functions I need as a man,” he explained. However, there was one major downside: “I can’t have kids.” Despite this, Ricketts remains positive and passionate about the importance of early detection. He has been cancer free for over two years. “I went through a lot dealing with cancer, but I have no complaints.” 

He encourages men to go to the doctor and get your PSA checked. “You need to have a baseline PSA level, and if it goes up, your doctor will know what to do to save your life and help you continue living your best life,” he urged. Ricketts’ story serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of regular health checks, especially for men with a family history of prostate cancer. His journey is a testament to the value of early detection, proactive health management, and faith in navigating life’s challenges.

Alexander has closed another chapter in his life that had been open for decades. “I was very lucky to find my biological father’s family. I have a brother, a sister, a niece and a nephew on that side. I did a DNA test, and my niece had done the same thing. The company connected us and suggested that we should connect and talk. I met my brother for the first time last summer in Raleigh.”

I asked the Connecticut native how it was meeting his family for the first time. “It was really cool to have a family on that side, yet I hate that I didn’t get to see my father. But I have no complaints, because God has blessed me to have closed the door on that chapter in my life.” 

As an adult, he looked back on his experience growing up fatherless and found that it had become a valuable asset when he became a police officer. “It was never on my radar to become a police officer as a kid. I was a Big Brother with Big Brothers Big Sisters, so I thought maybe if I joined the police department, I could make a greater impact and a bigger difference in the community as a Black male officer and help build their confidence.” 

Ricketts overcame his lack of confidence when he joined the military. “The Marine Corps helped me build confidence in my abilities and taught me that I could succeed. It showed me how to sit in any room, pay attention, learn, and be productive. Most importantly, it helped me become an asset wherever I go.” 

As a mentor myself, I’ve noticed that because of the lack of vision, our youth lack confidence. Like Ricketts, I see a lot of young Black males living their lives without a plan. His advice to the young brothas: “You could pray, but you really have to start making moves as well and stop depending on something magically happening,” said the retired lieutenant. As he spoke, the Bible verse, “Faith without works is dead,” came to mind. 

Officer Ricketts shared his experience working with many single parents, emphasizing the importance of being an active and positive presence in a child’s life. He stated, “At least be an active father in your child’s life, and be a good role model, protector, and provider. In my experience as a police officer, having a male role model has helped many young Black men become more successful. A positive male and female role model can show our youth that there are more options in life than what’s portrayed on social media, in rap music, or in video games. The messages they’re receiving from these sources won’t help them become productive, successful people. So, parents, make sure you’re not only a presence in your children’s lives, but that you’re someone they can look up to.”

The officer offers this advice to his fellow officers: “If you have time, get out of your car and spend 20-30 minutes at a corner store or somewhere in the neighborhood to meet people. Early in my career, doing this helped me solve crimes because the community trusted me. We became like family. That connection is crucial. Community policing can help prevent situations where you might react out of fear and escalate things unnecessarily, such as shooting someone.”

He added, “Working as a cop helped me raise my daughter. I’ve dealt with parents that would tell me. ‘I can’t do nothing with my child. Y’all, go ahead and take them. I can’t do anything with them.’ I asked, where’s his father? The mother would say, he ain’t here, and never been around. I asked if the child is doing any activities. Or if they’re in school. The parents tell me no, the child just sits at home or hangs out with friends.” 

The father of one says he learned that both parents need to be actively involved in a child’s life, and that if you’re not going to be home when they return from school, “You have to provide activities to keep them engaged. It’s also important to support their education by making sure they have the resources they need to learn,” he said. 

Alexander continued, “Because of what I’ve witnessed, I just talked to my daughter for what felt like forever. At first, I didn’t think she was listening, but it turns out, she actually was. She heard me. Sometimes, you think you’re just speaking into the air, but they’re listening more than you realize. And to my wife’s credit, she’s going to graduate college, to become a registered nurse like her mother, who is my daughter’s role model. My daughter is very confident in who she is and what she chose to do. We’re extremely proud of her.”

I asked him what the formula of his successful two-parent household was. “My wife didn’t try to be the executive on the job. She let me be the leader in reference to my career. When you get promoted at work, it often means changing shifts. So, she adjusted her career to ensure she could always be home when our daughter got back from school. I could take her to work or she would take our daughter to school. It was important to us to maintain that balance. And I always tell couples, everyone runs their household differently, but it’s crucial that someone makes those adjustments, even if it sounds a little crazy. The goal is to find a way to make it all work without sacrificing family time.”

During his time as a lieutenant, he began pursuing his childhood dream, one that had nothing to do with law enforcement. “Being a DJ was always something I wanted to do. I probably started thinking about it when I was around 12 years old.” I asked Alexander about the difference between adrenaline as an officer and DJ. “When I was a police officer, it was a whole different story. The adrenaline there was more about survival, fight or flight. I was dealing with high-stress situations, people’s problems, and sometimes life-or-death moments. And when you’re in those situations, it’s not about feeling good.”  

When he’s DJing, it’s all about the good vibes. “The endorphins, the crowd’s energy, it all comes together and lifts me up. I’m hyped, I feel great, and I can see people enjoying themselves, dancing, and just having a good time. It’s a positive, high-energy kind of feeling. That’s the kind of adrenaline I thrive on, the kind that makes everyone feel good,” he shared.

In 2021, he retired as a lieutenant with the Greensboro Police Department after 24 years and seven months of service. Now, he’s living his best life, traveling the world with his beautiful wife, Suronda, with whom he’s shared 25 wonderful years. So, how is he enjoying his retirement? “I just try to remember that the beautiful moments I have here on earth are because someone sacrificed for me. I could be enjoying retirement, and not doing any kind of volunteer work. But I just keep grinding it out and trying to make a difference in people’s lives, not just through mentoring children, but being a boost of confidence to my family, friends and everyone that I meet. 

“And I have no complaints about that.”

My Phenomenal Person of the Week is Alexander Ricketts.