WS Chronicle

By Busta Brown

As we celebrate Women’s History Month, it is truly an honor to celebrate a phenomenal woman each week. 

This is the story of a little girl who had to take speech classes to learn how to pronounce words more clearly. After high school, she had to take remedial classes.

“I would have to read something more than three times because I couldn’t understand what I read. The further I went with my education, the greater the words would get. I was pulled out of class with the normal students to go to this special little room for students like me. This struggle with my speech went into my adulthood, so I always felt abnormal,” shared Dr. Telika McCoy. 

How did the university professor overcome her struggles? “I learned to love myself and appreciate that it takes me a longer time to learn or I learn it differently sometimes. Once I embraced that I was abnormal, everything began to move forward. 

“What also helped me overcome my insecurities is that my parents always taught me to be sure I was a respectable person, and to guard my reputation. Because people will always remember who you are, but not so much what you are. You get to choose your profession. But my parents taught me to focus more on who I need to be when you grow up. And to be a responsible member of the community and a person that respects God. Do what you want, but be who you need to be in that particular role,” shared Dr. McCoy. 

She continued, “We know you’re a judge, nurse, doctor, etc., but remember this: There is always going to be another what you are. But there’s only you, and it’s who you are that’s going to go the distance.” 

She learned that first hand, when she was no longer an only child. “My father told me that I was responsible for my little brother. And I was just a kid myself! I was thinking, how am I responsible for the protection, nourishment and growth of another human? For instance, when we went to the mall, my father would say, ‘Hold his hand and don’t let go.’ I wasn’t much older or bigger than my brother. Even as a child, I knew it didn’t make much sense,” said the Winston-Salem native. 

Neither Telika nor her father were aware he had prepared the university professor to walk in God’s calling on her life. “As I grew older, I was learning how to care for someone outside of myself. And in ministry, that is paramount to what we do,” said Telika. Along with her role as a university professor, she’s a youth pastor and youth advocate. 

Dr. McCoy has worked with UNC and The Ministries Conference advocating for youth. With a Ph.D. in human services and master’s of divinity degree, “I wanted to make sure my degree would be in serving people. Under my degree is human services, social services, working with child abuse and neglect, and domestic violence. These are all of the things I’m going to see in and outside of the church. My Ph.D. in human services prepared me to have a diverse view on the human condition.” 

Ever since I’ve known Telika, she’s been a giver, a comforter, a great listener, an excellent leader, and she has never fallen short of displaying excellent character. It gives her great joy to put the needs of others before her own. What I dig most about this remarkable woman is her unwavering faith in God. Telika’s spirit of humility has made her one of the most sought-after preachers and speakers in the country. When she preaches, you immediately feel a soothing of your spirit. The presence of God is always wherever she is. 

But becoming the phenomenal preacher and teacher that she is today has its challenges. “I had to learn to get out of my own way. Sometimes I had to be very careful not to sit with my own voice and then perceive what’s going on. If they invited me to preach, then they don’t have an issue with a woman preacher. But that took time to develop. So many of us are in our own way. Yet, female preachers have to deal with issues a male preacher doesn’t. We have to struggle with what to wear, so we don’t look too sexy. We ask ourselves, is our skirt too short? Or it could be how we wear our hair. In ministry, sometimes the presence and the beauty of a woman takes up space. And some people are uncomfortable with that reality. People put handles on women’s names. Some people don’t want to acknowledge us by the titles we’ve earned. It wasn’t until God used me in my gift, I was acknowledged as a person with a gift, not a woman with a gift,” said Dr. McCoy. 

One day while serving as the on-call chaplain at a hospital in Raleigh, her gift was put to the test and something incredible happened! “Someone was seriously injured at the State Fair. When they were transported to the hospital, I was in the trauma room. The chaplain is the person that contacts families of someone that was seriously injured. I saw one woman that was injured but alert. I whispered in her ear that I was the advocate for the patients to get in contact with your family. I went back to the hospital weeks later and was in the hall talking to somebody. And this woman walked up to me and said, ‘It’s you. I heard your voice and it’s the same voice that whispered in my ear while I was in the trauma center fighting for my life.’ She said, ‘It’s the same voice I heard when you prayed for me.’ 

“I didn’t recognize who she was because the last time I saw her, she was bruised and battered. God used my gift through the power of my voice. That was a defining moment because it exceeds femininity, gender, and race. God used my voice to be a comfort and peace for her. We need to learn to use our voice to comfort and bring peace to ourselves, because you matter,” said an excited Telika.  

It was experiences such as this that inspired her to write her latest book, “That Day: Enjoy The One You Have. Improve The One To Come.”

“Some of us just want to have a good day. It’s about managing that day when I had an unhealthy personal truth. It’s called ‘That Day: Enjoy The One You Have. Improve The One To Come’ because that’s what I fought for. It was just liberation when I had that victory of overcoming and liberating myself to have a good day. We all deserve that,” said Telika. 

I agreed with Dr. McCoy one hundred percent when she shared with me that a lot of us are after college degrees, money, relationships, and so on. But some of us have no desire for any of that. We just want to have a good day. Some of us don’t have a job right now, money, or are dealing with depression. And your only prayer to God is to have a good day. “This book is inspired by me learning how not to just live life, but how to manage my days and to identify the type of day I’m having. Then we say, ‘I don’t have bad days, I have different types of good days,’” said McCoy. 

She continued, “If it’s a day when you’re feeling lonely, or like life is unfair, it doesn’t have to be a bad day. It’s only characterized as a bad day. That day, enjoy the one you have, improve the one to come, is an inspirational guide so that you can reflect daily on how you get to control the characterizing of your day. You could say this is a bad day and be done with it. Or you could manage every day and see that the day is not bad, it’s just a different type of good day. You’ll enjoy this day that the Lord has made and that you can be glad in it every day. But it takes work, but sometimes we don’t want to do the work. We just sit there and complain. You deserve better than that,” said Telika.

I asked: what do you want our readers to walk away with? “Vigor to do something! Because so many times we read, watch and listen to things, but we don’t always activate that which we have heard, watched, and read. So, I hope this will start a fire that will burn up all the negative corners of your life, so that good things can grow.”

My Phenomenal Woman of the Week is Dr. Telika McCoy. To contact Dr. McCoy, send an email to drtelikamccoy@gmail.com or call 919-807-1194.  Find her on all social media platforms @drtelikamccoy.